Motherhood Archives - All Things Mothering

The Mom I Want To Be In 2020

As we enter another new year, yet again. I find myself writing all my goals down for the year. Including my mom goals. This is nothing new for me as I am a paper and pen kind of person. I like to see all my thoughts, to-do lists, and goals on paper.

As my oldest daughter is inching towards her teen years, I’ve been thinking about how I want her to remember her childhood here at home. When she leaves I don’t want her to say mom worked all the time or was too busy for me.

I am challenging myself to be more present this year with not only my oldest but with all my girls. I hear people say this all the time and never actually do it. Why are our phones so important to everyone? There is nothing on facebook or Instagram that could be more important than our families.

While I do have both of these apps and I consider deleting them almost daily, they are not my problem. I have a hard time not answering my emails and my work messages immediately. I feel like my kids are always waiting for me to be done talking to my boss or one of my clients. This year I want to change that and only work when they aren’t present. Even if it means getting up at 4 am to start my day.

My girls are only little once and I don’t want to miss any of it. I understand that there is a time for work, school, play, and so on, but for the most part, I want to be fully present. The Lord gave me these children to raise for him and I need to do a job well done. Children should be a mother’s most important work!

This year I want to give my children the gift of being present. I want to make more memories with them this year. I want to be there for everything!

My mom goals this year are to be more

Patient
Kind
Loving
Understanding
Present

How I Plan To Achieve This

I notice that I am more short-spoken and not as kind when I don’t get up before the kids. I think that it is much better to start the day earlier than the girls instead of them waking me up.

When I am dressed, I have had some coffee, and some alone time with the Lord I am much nicer, than if I had just woke up and everyone needs something immediately. While this is no excuse to be unkind I am just saying what works best for me.

Putting away my phone during school time. When I am trying to teach the girls I don’t need to have my phone on. I am the type of person that has to answer everything immediately and this alone leaves me frustrated because the kids need me, someone on my phone needs me, and then I’m distracted thinking about work or checking something for work. That’s how it starts for me. Then I am a frazzled mess cause all I can think about is the work that needs to be done. It’s better if I don’t even see what I need to do in terms of work until I sit down for work.

I plan on putting my phone on silent while I am helping the girls with their schoolwork. Homeschooling the girls is very important to me and I want to give them my full attention and help them reach their full potential. I can’t do that if I am distracted.

What I Want My Girls To Remember When They’re Grown

That mom let them help in the kitchen with meals.
Taught them about the Lord.
That we had regular picnics.
That we laughed a lot.
That I made them homemade chicken soup whenever they were sick.
That I always listened.
That we always had a good time when we ate meals together.
That I read to them often.
Tucked them in and sang to them every night.
Let them make messes.
That we colored together often.

I know I will fail at this at some point, but I don’t want to. The Lord is helping me to grow as I parent these sweet girls. I am learning right alongside them. They are learning to be kind and forgiving and so am I. No one is perfect and we all fail.

Tell me what your goals are as a mom in the comments or send me an email.

The Silver Solution Review

by Tosha Leave a Comment

** I received these products in return for an honest review. Everything that is stated below is my personal opinion.**

These products were sent to me a couple of months ago and I asked them could I have a month or two to use them before writing this blog post. They were very kind and have excellent customer service. Every time I emailed them with a question they responded almost immediately and offered several times to call me.

Before I jump into why I love the products let me give you some general info. The author of the book, Dr. Gordon Pedersen, started his research so that he could help people improve their health. In his booklet, he talks about all the ways that you can use structured silver. Everything from killing germs in your drinking water to killing bacterial infections. There is so much to learn from that 83-page booklet, that I highly recommend you purchase it if you order anything from them. You will be amazed at the things in that book. Its like magic in a bottle!

I know everyone is skeptical about a product that claims it can help in so many ways and honestly you will have to do your own research and decide for yourself. Good products can be so hard to find that don’t include bad ingredients. This is like multitasking, taking care of two issues at once. I would never rub Germ-X on my girl’s faces, because of the harsh chemicals in it, but this kills the germs while moisturizing their face.

I’m gonna start with their lotion since it was used the most often and I’m gonna be repurchasing another bottle soon. I have extremely dry skin and I have bought tons of products to try on my skin. So many in fact that I have a tote full under my sink of ones that don’t work and because they are still full I can’t bring myself to throw away. Anyone else hoard such things? I mean I did spend money on them, after all.

Anyway, this lotion was different. It felt so nice on my skin and absorbed quickly instead of staying on my skin like cake icing. That may be your thing, but it is not mine. I want my lotion to sink in and moisturize. Not hang around for all to see! While using this lotion I also noticed that I didn’t need as much if that makes sense. The more I used it the less I needed. Like over the course of a few weeks a little became a lot and my skin felt so much better.

This lotion was also great for my daughters Eczema patches. Her patches had been really bad around her face and back, but this cream seemed to help clear it up a lot faster than the others. I’m very picky about what I put on my daughter’s skin, but even more so on her face. However, this lotion was very soothing to her and because the ingredients are so good, I didn’t feel bad about putting them on her face.

In the summertime, one of my older daughters seems to get staff every time she gets a mosquito bite. No matter what I do, it always happens multiple times in the summer. This summer since using the lotion she did not get staff one time. I didn’t even realize this until I was thinking about it the other day. She has been bitten many times this year, but no staff this summer! The other thing different that we did was use this lotion. For just this reason alone I would recommend this! The price of the lotion is worth it to me just to keep you out of the doctor’s office.

Another one of my favorites from this box was the gel. I have been putting it on my face multiple times a day. As a teen, this was not a problem. I hit 25 and it was hello adult acne. Why? I thought I had surpassed this.

This gel is excellent for it. Not only does it moisturize my face, but it kills germs too! Another reason I like this gel is the silky way it feels on my face. I personally have been keeping my bottle in the fridge and in the morning time that cold cream just feels so good. I have been putting this on my face 2-3 times a day. Once my bottle runs out I will be repurchasing this. I don’t often repurchase the same products because I never find a lotion or face cream that just works for me, but this did! There were a few days I’d forget to use it and my acne would come back. So far my face has been much clearer than normal. One of the things that I had hoped it would clear up was my red skin patches on my cheeks and while I think it did help some it didn’t make them go away completely. I have always had red skin blotches and they’ve gotten worse as I’ve gotten older.

Another one of my favorites out of the kit they sent me was the soap. My skin is super sensitive and I can’t use just any soap. My skin drys out very easily and if I use anything with lots of chemicals it makes me itchy. This soap didn’t make me feel overly dry and I wasn’t itchy all the time. All of my girls have super sensitive skin and this soap didn’t dry out their skin. Sometimes I have found that even natural soap that will work for me, will not work for them. It will still dry out their skin and make them itch.

The next product in the kit is a bottle of Silver Solution Supplement. This is a tasteless liquid that can you drink every day depending on what you are trying to achieve with it. I wanted to see if I could reduce the number of headaches that I was having in a week. Working online every day contributes to it, but I would love to completely do away with them. I have been drinking the Silver Solution for almost two months and I have found that I have had fewer headaches in the last couple of weeks. In the book, it lists a few things that you can do to help eliminate the headaches. Besides the solution, I added a b vitamin supplement and the CoQ10. All these things together seem to be helping.

I was also gifted 2 bags of lozenges, but I haven’t used those yet. I am sure they will be amazing just like the rest of the products. We will definitely be using them this fall when all the colds start making its rounds in the family.

I also wanted to add that this would make a great gift. Put a few of the items in a basket with a cute handtowel and you have the perfect house shower gift.

I was so thrilled that Dr. Gordon Pedersen’s team agreed to work with me and share their products with my family. I hope that this review gives you some insight into their amazing products. If you have any questions I will do my best to answer them and if I don’t have the answer I’ll ask their helpful team.

Why I Hate my Cellphone

by Tosha 4 Comments

I’m sure you have noticed by now that we live in a world that loves technology. It advances almost daily, which in a way is incredible, but in another way its sad.

What is this technology really causing us to gain? A social life? New friends?

I know that everyone will say that their iPhone has given them a new life, a lonely mom now has online mom friends, you can find a date for Friday, or order you some food at a discount for using the online app. We can even take it one step further and talk to our gadgets without ever picking up our phone and still get exactly what we wanted.

Its no secret that I love technology! I think that it can be a great tool, but I wonder if I were to ask Alexa how to spend more time with my children what she would say? Or If I asked her how to make them happy? I wonder if Alexa could tell me approximately how much time an average iPhone user gives their full attention to their children?

When did our families become less important? When did God’s blessings become second to our phones? When I had my youngest two girls iPhones didn’t exist. I was fully present with them. I might have gotten a text on my phone every now and then, but nothing like I get now. I believe that the iPhone upped the texting drastically from those crazy buttons on the old phones. It took forever to text and I would just rather call you anyway.

I went back to work when my second daughter was a year and it broke my heart. She cried for me everyday for the next 18 months. I would cry all the way too work hating the fact I had to leave her. My oldest would take it in spurts one month she was fine and one month it was the end of the world for her. As a mom you never want to see your children in distress, but I knew that I couldn’t not work yet. When I came home full time I was so thrilled to be home with the girls. It had been so hard to leave them and not be able to take care of them like I wanted to.

My prayer was that God would allow me to come home so that I could take care of the girls. That last year I worked I homeschooled Megan in the afternoons after I left work, cooked supper, ran the home, laundry, and so on. However, when I think about how I accomplished my tasks I wonder if I had had an iPhone would I have been able to accomplish it all. I will admit that I am ashamed to say I spend way too much time on my phone now. To be honest I don’t think I would have been able to do everything I needed to do and be present with the girls.

I think having our phones can be great to post pictures, seek out an old friend, or just to chat, but when it takes precious time away from family we should draw the line. Your little one is only little for so long and they deserve our attention. I am not saying that we should entertain our children 24/7, but to be present and really be there for them.

It is such a shame that we would rather hit the home button on the screen instead of being present in our own home with people that you love. God gave me those special little blessings and it is my job to take care of them. I want to be present in my girl’s lives. When they get bigger I don’t want them to look back and say mom was always on her phone. I don’t want them to ever say to me, “why didn’t you spend more time with me?” I saw a post the other day that said “you will never look back and regret spending time with your child”. How true is that statement? I will never regret teaching them to read, ride a bike, how to cook, or just cuddle.

God has really been laying it on my heart lately that I spend to much time on my phone for no reason. I am guilty of scrolling through facebook for no reason. I am guilty of browsing Pinterest more than I should. I am guilty of answering emails when I could have waited until they were in the bed. I don’t want my iPhone to become an addiction or more of an addiction. I miss the days where you laid your phone on the microwave and didn’t think nothing else about it until you left the house.

I don’t want to be guilty of not being there for my children in a world so full of distraction. Next time you pick up that phone be aware of what your children are doing. Are they begging you to play a game, but your too “busy”? Are they aggravating you a little because they want your full attention?

With God’s help I want to cuddle my girls more, put together more puzzles, and just enjoy them without the distraction of a cellphone.

If this is something you have been struggling with, then please let me know about it in the comments below.

Pregnancy & Birth Story

by Tosha 12 Comments

Welcome to the world Juliann Irene ♥♥

On January 24, of this year I gave birth to our third little girl, Juliann. I was so excited and relived that she was finally here. My pregnancy with her was extremely rough. I had a tear in my placenta as well as placenta previa, so bed rest it was for nearly 4 months. I was scared that I would lose her almost everyday. I begged God constantly to let me carry her because I couldn’t bear the thought of losing another baby. Children are such a joy and I couldn’t wait until I could hold her and know that she was in safe in my arms versus my body. I kept telling myself just make it to 26 weeks and maybe the nicu could take care of her better than I could. I have always been a heathy person and never had any major problems. I felt like my own body was turning against our precious little girl.

I had never heard of placenta previa up until about a month before I got pregnant. I was reading a book about a lady that had gotten pregnant when her third baby was only a month old and she ended up being hospitalized for placenta previa. She laid flat on her back for months and I believe that they had to give her blood regularly because of how much she was losing. I do not remember if placenta previa was the sole cause of her blood loss.

I started bleeding when I was 9 weeks pregnant. I had went to church on a Wednesday night and before the service could start, I left and went straight to ER. I knew that that was too much blood to be losing. They checked me over and assured me many times that they believed the baby was fine, but they could not find where the blood was coming from. They sent me home and told me to see my doctor as soon as possible. I went in the next day still bleeding and had been all night. As soon as I saw my doctor she sent me straight to the ultrasound tech’s office. As soon as she swished it over my belly she found the heartbeat. I was so thankful that my baby was ok. My doctor came back in to see me and decided that light duty was best. I mostly stayed on the sofa, or sat in a chair outside so the girls could play. Everything seemed to be going great until I hit 11 weeks. I got up one morning and I knew as soon as I stood up what was going on. I called the doctor and went back in. They completed another ultrasound to check on baby and to find the source of bleeding. They finally found a spot that looked like blood, but they couldn’t really find the exact cause of the bleeding. I was put on bedrest for another two weeks and I was scheduled to come in weekly, but I was actually coming in almost daily. I was bleeding everyday and all the time. Every time I would stand up I would get a gush and back to the doctor I would go. I’m sure your thinking why do I keep going back, but I had to know that the baby was ok. I finally purchased a Doppler so that I could reassure myself.

This continued until week 26 or 27 and the bleeding just stopped. The doctor had said my placenta had finally moved to the right place and the bleeding was gone. We never did exactly figure out what caused all the bleeding. I was finally told that some women just bleed when they are pregnant and as scary as that is, there is nothing that you can do.

My older girls had been staying with my mom or my husbands mom the whole time I was on bedrest. They would come stay a day or two, but then go back. I was so glad to finally have my girls back home with me. I felt like my self again. I was doing light cleaning, cooking meals which I had missed and just really, really enjoyed being with the girls.

I had a few scares after I hit 30 weeks, but nothing serious. The day I had Julie I had been scrubbing the house top to bottom. I started contracting irregularly around 1 pm and by 8 that night they were pretty regular. Finally around 1 am I told my husband we needed to head to the hospital. Everything was going slow once I arrived and they suggested I walk some. I was hurting pretty good after an hour walk and they wanted to give me a pain shot to see if y contractions went away. I slept for about 30 minutes and they came back in to check on me. They formally admitted me and sent me to my room. After my epidural I slept on and off until 3:30 when they called my doctor down. I had a sweet 7lb. 5oz baby girl at 4:01 pm.

I couldn’t be more pleased that our little Juliann (Jewel) is here. She is certainly a precious gift from God and a jewel from Him above. We must never forget to praise Him for all he does for us. All to Him I owe!